How To Be A Douche In Jiu-Jitsu

By
kitt canaria
-

As with all sports or simply activities, there are some unspoken rules to be following in Jiu-Jitsu. Training partners should have a mutual respect for each other, and an attitude that shows that respect. However, some Jiu Jitsu jerks, have been breaking the following unspoken and unwritten rules. To spell things out clearly for the challenged Jiu Jitsu jerks, here are the top 10 actions that can qualify you as a jerk of a training partner who lacks respect and a good attitude:

10. Celebrating after a live sparring tap
Nothing is quite as childish as a celebratory “Yes!” or “Who’s your daddy?” after a training partner has tapped someone in a bow and arrowlive sparring BJJ training. Actions such as these are rude and disrespectful.

9. Unchecked anger at being submitted that turns into aggression
Just as bad as the previous not to do, getting angry after you have been submitted and coming back three times more aggressive shows that you lack discipline and respect.

8. Saying let’s go light, and then not following through
If you and your training partner agree to go light, then follow through and remain true to your word. Not doing so shows your immaturity and need to one up your partner.

7. Referring to who tapped who
Asking someone if they tapped the training partner you rolled with before is for kids. The “who tapped who” mentality doesn’t belong in adult Jiu Jitsu. Sparing is sparing, and it should not be consider the same as a proper fight.

6. Pushing the partners nose with your wrist/hand
It is legal to open up the opponent’s neck when he tucks his chin, however do you really want to do that in a training scenario?

5. Knee on the throat
The ugly twin of knee on the belly, some Jiu Jitsu jerks just can’t help themselves from this one. In fact, a chest ride move will have the same effect, yet can facilitate sliding across the opponents biceps, making it better than some other methods.

4. Wash your gi!
You might enjoy smelling your manliness, but I can guarantee no one else does.

3. Keep your nails short
Your nails should have a regular date with nail clippers, or at least a nail file. Scratching training partners is not the way to get on their good side. Having longer nails not only makes you a careless Jiu Jitsu jerk, but it also leaves you and your partner vulnerable for injury.

2. Heel hooks of 240 degrees
You may be very tempted, but this is not the UFC and you are not Paul Harris. You can position yourself for a heel hook, however, no money is involved, so don’t add vigor to your move.

1. Ringworm is still taboo
Ringworm is a cause to stay home and see the doctor, not a cause calling you to come to practice or to compete. Some Jiu Jitsu masters would call this the ultimate sin, making you the ultimate Jiu Jitsu jerk.

If you need to know How to be a jerk in Jiu-Jitsu (Please don’t be one), follow the aforementioned don’t dos.


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58 COMMENTS

  14. You forgot suffocating the opponent on the ground with your Gi, rubbing his face with your face: (oops i missed a throw, sorry), chin in the eye socket, knuckle grind to the ear when a chocked is missed, drooling on the guy while you're on top of him and ultimately, kissing the guy and after he's distracted breaking his neck, arm or balance… =) Happy Joint Manipulating people!

  16. i did accidentally get someone with a toe nail once (well clipped) it was just the angle. as i was getting mauled and was spun under a much more aggressive and skilled opponent, my big toe slammed into his heal and cut him. mind you I got mauled worse after which left me with my first stage of cauliflower ear. ahh haha them the breaks.

  18. Yes, I agree, but if someone is trying to darce choke you and you tap because it is a crank instead of a blood choke I think it is helpful to your partner to let them know. Same if its a bow and arrow and its across your chin instead of on your throat… I'd definitely tap before I got my teeth smashed, but it certainly wasn't correct. It really depends on what your motivation is: pure ego vs a sincere desire to help your partner get better.

  23. If it is just a sparring session, there is no "victor". The NEED to choke your opponent is non-existent.
    Yes… Knowing how to DEFEND against that maneuver IS Necessary.
    So a specific time should be put towards focusing on that technique.
    It's just common courtesy. Let your PARTNER (not opponent) -who is there to help you get better, just like you are- know what is coming.

  24. Jarrod Spillers I hear you. But when you and I explain it was a crank and not a choke – often it's because the other guy asks how it felt, and we then give the thumbs up and say, hey, you got me anyway. Because even if they get us an uncomfortable position, it's our responsibility to stay out of it in the first place. I agree, the "you're not doing it right" we are talking about is about pure ego, where the guy arrogantly starts instructing you after he taps (lol). It's a great pet peeve for jits guys, because one of the greatest things about jits is that it is the antidote for he said she said office politics – where people talk until they are blue in the face about the "right way" to be effective instead of being effective.

  27. Joshua Quekewatzo Andrade Jiujit su is reality, you can't theory craft a fight. You have to prepare for every scenario, if you dont train for it, you will fail at it.

  28. Our necks are precious. We need to protect them over all things. If you don't tell the dude it was a crank how will he know. Then he will continue to hurt other peoples necks with bad jiu jitsu

  29. yeah but if your neck cranking someone instead of choking them its not an effective technique because bigger guys wont tap to neck cranks, but they damn well will tap to chokes. So its good if someone shows you how to do it the right way. I never mind getting pointers. Just save them till after the round, because what I do hate are people who don't roll the entire round, *** holes are wasting my open mat time.

  30. Joshua and Yu Ji, using your logic, then I should be allowed to punch you in the face if you do knee-on-neck on me. It's a hobby for crying out loud. Dont be a douche.

  31. I occasionally use knee on neck/face to escape armbars from guard when stacking and they keep on holding on rather than transitioning…. but I start with very little pressure, and increase it very slowly, until they transition… not dirty… but still, this is a decent guide.

  40. Yu Ji Of course it's legit Jiu Jitsu to incorporate punching and slapping, that's what it's all about. I usually incorporate my shank and 9mm for light grazing into my sparring. Hope you're prepared, this is reality, no theory crafting.

  43. I think the point here is not that you go for the knee on the neck choke, which IS a legit move and you should learn how to defend against, but the issue where the guy just pushes it against your neck/face with no point, increasing the intensity just to hurt you and, you know, being a **** with a move overall. No need to hurt your partner aimlessly if it doesn't work or if your opponent isn't smart enough to tap you get no valor points or any other **** by trying to hurt him.

    just my two cents

  44. I clip my nails all the time even bought 3 sets of clippers for the gym. yet I sometimes still scratch people even when my nails are all the way back so far they are bleeding for a day. any tips?

  50. I disagree with the hand to throat but with a caveat. I think That people should be aware of it, but I also think that you should monitor how much pressure you put on the larynx. Same with knee on throat don't go full force but certainly place it there if you see a benefit to it.

  51. I agree BUT I think that you shouldn't drop the knee on the neck, you can PLACE it there gently and give the other person an opportunity to address it.

  53. Yea, no one is advocating kneeing your partner in the face as hard as you can. The point is to train the position, and not to avoid it because it causes a little pain or discomfort. Obviously we are trying not to hurt our partner, but if the move just hurts a little its ok. You dont want to be a gym where everyone is so soft they will tap to shoulder pressure in a live tourney or can't handle themslves in a real fight.

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