Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu > Marriage Counseling

Jason Casillas Facebook. Used with permission

Many couples find themselves training BJJ together, whether they were together before they found the sport or they found each other through the sport. My husband and I are one of these couples, and we have tons of friends who are too. One thing I’ve noticed is that at some point, we can all credit BJJ with saving our relationships. I’d even argue that BJJ saves our marriage every single day.

There are several reasons I say this, but the most obvious is that it gives us a common ground. We hold each other accountable and encourage each other… that’s what teammates do, right? I definitely would have fallen off the BJJ bandwagon if it weren’t for my husband. I love the sport independently of my relationship with him, but I also love that it’s something we do together. We talk about techniques and tournaments, we watch big events together, and neither of us feels like we have to face the struggles of jiu-jitsu alone. He knows when I’ve had a hard time at class before I even say anything. He helps me problem solve and get back out there.

Jiu-jitsu also gives us both an outlet when “marriage crap” does come up. It’s inevitable. There was a specific time that we argued the whole way to the gym over absolutely ridiculous, petty stuff. By the time class was over, we both walked out covered in sweat and laughing. When the car doors closed, we didn’t jump back into the argument like we would have before we found BJJ. We both recognized how silly it was and apologized, agreeing to have a great night together.

No relationship is ever perfect, but jiu-jitsu has given us a lot more weapons in our arsenal to fight off the statistics of divorce. Besides, who would get the gym if we split?

I could list a million benefits of training with your significant other, but what do you think? Does it help or hurt your relationship?


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